Advertorial version 2
CV203C2 17 – 10 – 2007
Advertorial version 2.
Words: 702
The golden taste of our new collection
Are you ready for our new summer collection?
O’Neill is proud to announce the new summer collection 2008. The temperature is rising, the sun is shining and evenings become more pleasant. O’Neill makes your summer complete with the brand new O’Neill summer collection 2008. Our designers have combined the latest fashions trends and comfort within the new O’Neill summer collection 2008. Diversity and quality are the keywords for this new collection. What do you think about our new flip flops? You are guaranteed to get the best of the best. And lets be honest, why should you wear an ugly short if you also could wear the best? O’Neill is a stylish speciality brand mostly for surfers, snowboarders but also for people who just enjoy life. We design and create with care for your lifestyle and mentality to give you the best suitable outfit. All year O’Neill has been in motion to create and develop a new comfortable and stylish summercollection. Every season has his own way of life. Be a popular snowboarder in the Aspen during the winter and become a cool, trendy looking person during the summer. Every season you can choose the best suitable outfit.
Amazing reactions from the states!
Last Saturday O’Neill showed their new summer collection 2008 to the American audience. In just three hours over more than fifty-five brands showed their new collection! It was a challenge to give the audience the diversity and also a good feeling about their collection. The designers combined fashion and comfort and they did it outstanding. The courage was there and the result was a three hours during show about the most trendy summer clothing. The red carpet was on and over more than five thousand guest were witnesses of this amazing show. In a fully booked New York fashion house the show began. A diversity of the collection came up during the show. From flip flops to shorts, every aspect of a successful summer was in the ‘house’. The jury linked all these ideas in a taste for an extreme point of view. The prize for the winner was a $550.000,- cheque. O’Neill was obvious the number one. Susanne Bilson, executive officer of Mango and also member of the jury explained why O’Neill has become the winner of this show: ‘these clothes are wonderful: to be honest we never expected that O’Neill got the capabilities to design such beautiful clothing’‘I really don’t know what to say, I’m speechless at this moment’, said Bilson according to O’Neill TV.
Don’t hesitate!
We want to give you something special. A strong, good feeling, something you will never forget. Once you have discovered O’Neill clothing it’s like you are in heaven. There is no turning back. You will remain loyal to it. What do you think about our new sandals, isn’t nice to wear during those warm summer days? Grasp your towel, put your sunglasses on and let’s enjoy the sunshine days. We are staying to improve and create that strong feeling between you and O’Neill.
Choose our new summer collection!
Have the guts and taste to experience the fresh and sweet summer feeling that comes with O’Neill clothing. Every aspect of our brand will make your life more fashionable and comfortable. If there was any question about what you would be wearing this summer, their isn’t any anymore! Enjoy the bright side of O’Neill’s summer.
Get your own catwalk ticket
Are you curious already and want to get a preview? With all these positive sounds from the states, you should be. That’s the reason why we give you, an one in a lifetime opportunity, to be present at this event. With the New York skyline behind us, we move to Europe to settle down this special catwalk event. All international tabloids has notice this event on their agenda. The red carpet will be rolled out again and you can be there. O’Neill brings you a European catwalk presenting O’Neills new summer collection 2008. It’s especially for the modern trendy young people. Enjoy the golden taste of our new collection on December the 10th in the Amsterdam RAI. Get your own catwalk ticket for this event. Be a winner, be a witness and don’t hesitate again! Surf to www.oneill.com/summer and be there!
Bronnenlijst:
O’neill, Viewed on 22 september 2007. From, http://www.oneilleurope.com/index.asp
Surfride, Viewed on 22 september 2007. From, http://www.surfride.com/assets/images/brands/brand_image_oneill.jpg
Oxigen, Viewed on 22 september 2007. From, http://www.oxigen.co.uk/images/linkpics/Neill-461-.jpg
Oxigen, Viewed on 22 september 2007. From, http://www.oxigen.co.uk/images/linkpics/Neill-430-H.jpg
Islandsurf, Viewed on 22 september 2007. From, http://islandsurf.com/images/products/large/16495125_coc_LG.jpg
Scene7, Viewed on 22 september 2007. From, http://s7v1.scene7.com/is/image/JohnLewis/000008378?$product$
Wikipedia, Viewed on 22 september 2007. From, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/O’Neill_(brand)
O’Neilleurope, Viewed on 22 september 2007. From, http://www.oneilleurope.com/index.asp
Kink, Viewed on 22 september 2007. From, http://www.kink.se/images/posts/oneill_spring06.jpg
Jubii, Viewed on 17 oktober 2007. From, http://tv.jubii.nl/channel/iLyROoaftmUK.html
Fashion blog, Viewed on 19 oktober 2007. From, http://fashion.blog.nl/new_york_fashion_week
Style, Viewed on 19 oktober 2007. From, http://www.style.com/fashionshows/
Peer review 2 of advertorial version 2
Weblog advertorial peer review form
Weblog Advertorial Peer Review Form B – Second Review
Writer’s Name Rick S._______________________________________
Assessor’s name Claudia N._______________________________________
Date 16-10-2007_______________________________________
Rating Scale: 1 = Yes 2 = Somewhat 3 = No
Rate the advertorial by giving a 1, 2 or 3 for each question. Read the advertorialonce to get a general idea of what it is about, then read it a second time to rate it.
1. Is the topic interesting? _1___
2. Is the title original and appropriate? _1___
3. Is the introduction complete? _2___
4. Is the body of your advertorial complete? _2___
5. Is the conclusion well-developed? _2___
6. Is the advertorial well-organized overall? _1___
7. Is the advertorial easy to understand? _1___
8. Is the advertorial interesting to read? _1___
9. Has any plagiarised material been removed? Wasn’t any____
Do you feel that the writer has improved the advertorial? Why or why not? Be specific.
Yes the article is longer and the grammar had improved.________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Has the writer changed the advertorial adequately according to your suggestions forimprovement of your first assessment? Describe the changes and state specificallywhether you think they are an improvement.
Yes it is longer and the sentences are more understandable. _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Are you happy to have this advertorial on your weblog? Why or why not? Be specific.
Yes, it is written very enthusiastic and you really want to go check out the catwalk idea. _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Give the writer this completed form.
Peer review advertorial version 1
Weblog advertorial peer review form
Weblog Advertorial Peer Review Form A – First Review
Writer’s Name _Rick Slaathuis _____________________________________
Assessor’s name _Claudia Nieweg da Silva Marcos______________________________________
Date 24-09-07_______________________________________
Rating Scale: 1 = Yes 2 = Somewhat 3 = No
Rate the advertorial by giving a 1, 2 or 3 for each question. Read the advertorialonce to get a general idea of what it is about, then read it a second time to rate it.
1. Is the title original and appropriate? 1____
2. Is the introduction complete? 2____
3. Is the body of your advertorial complete? 3___
4. Is the conclusion well-developed? 3____
5. Is the advertorial well-organized overall? 3____
6. Is the advertorial interesting to read? 2____
7. Has the writer plagiarised material? 3____
8. Is it clear what the product is? 1____
9. Is there a clear story? 2____
10. Is there a clear relationship between the story and the product? 2____
Finally, read the advertorial a third time and check it for spelling, grammar and punctuation.Mark any corrections on the advertorial itself then complete the rest of the form.
Name three things you like about the advertorial.
It tells you the good sides of the O’Neill summer collection. It tells you why you should buy it. It shows you pictures of the collection. __________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Name three things the writer should improve.
The body should be better.It’s not long enough.There should be less screaming to the customers as in buy buy buy it! _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Does the advertorial sell the product? Why?
No not yet because you should tell where you can get the product, when exactly it is coming out and what the main idea was behind the designs. _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Is the advertorial written for the specified O’Neill target group?
Yes it is although it could be done even better._______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Give the writer this completed form and the advertorial with corrections.
Advertorial version 1
CV203C2 22 – 09 – 2007
Advertorial version 1.
Words: 175
The golden taste of our new collection
Are you ready for our new summer collection?
O’Neill is proud to announce the new summer collection 2008. The temperature is rising, the sun is shining and evenings become more pleasant. O’Neill makes your summer complete with the brand new O’Neill summer collection 2008. Our designers have combined the latest fashions trends and comfort within the new O’Neill summer collection 2008. Diversity and quality are the keywords for this new collection.
Don’t hesitate!
Choose our new summer collection!
Have the guts and taste to experience the fresh and sweet summer feeling that comes with O’Neill clothing. Every aspect of our brand will make your life more fashionable and comfortable. O’Neill is a stylish speciality brand mostly for surfers, snowboarders but also for people who just enjoy life . We design and create with care for your lifestyle and mentality to give you the best suitable outfit.
If there was any question about what you would be wearing this summer, their isn’t any anymore! Enjoy the bright side of O’Neill’s summer.
Bronnenlijst:
Oneill, geraadpleegd op 22 september 2007. Van,
http://www.oneilleurope.com/index.asp
Surfride, geraadpleegd op 22 september 2007. Van,
http://www.surfride.com/assets/images/brands/brand_image_oneill.jpg
Oxigen, geraadpleegd op 22 september 2007. Van,
http://www.oxigen.co.uk/images/linkpics/Neill-461-.jpg
Oxigen, geraadpleegd op 22 september 2007. Van,
http://www.oxigen.co.uk/images/linkpics/Neill-430-H.jpg
Islandsurf, geraadpleegd op 22 september 2007. Van,
http://islandsurf.com/images/products/large/16495125_coc_LG.jpg
Scene7, geraadpleegd op 22 september 2007. Van,
http://s7v1.scene7.com/is/image/JohnLewis/000008378?$product$
Wikipedia, geraadpleegd op 22 september 2007. Van,
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/O’Neill_(brand)
O’Neilleurope, geraadpleegd op 22 september 2007. Van,
http://www.oneilleurope.com/index.asp
Kink, geraadpleegd op 22 september 2007. Van,
http://www.kink.se/images/posts/oneill_spring06.jpg
